Here are just some personal thoughts based on personal experience and maybe, there is something in there that can be of use. In no way do I pretend to know what you, or others, should or shouldn’t do.
You will be in a different place when you care for another dog. You will still mourn the passing of your first dog, but you will do it from a different place, namely a place where you are caring for another dog and where you are developing new and different trust and happiness. Your love for your first dog can be a part of you whilst you start developing a new relationship. And that is good, it is part of who you are and you will process it the way you do. Your new friend will understand when you are sad and be there for you. You will both develop a new bond and your first dog and the feelings for her/him are part of that. In the beginning you won’t have a bond with your new dog yet, and the way you mourn and process can develop as your new dog will accept who you are and where you are emotionally and that will form part of your new friendship. It’s simply part of who you are at that time in your life. I think we might be ready for a new pet earlier then we think, simply because we are not able to see how differently the process of mourning evolves when we will be in that new situation where we care for a new pet. It surprised me when I lost my first dog and just 2 weeks later I took in a sick street dog. I wasn’t ready. I was still devastated, but I had no choice. I took him in. I didn’t compare. He was a handful. He had been abused. He bit me. He was a great dog. I loved him. He was completely different. We developed a completely different relationship. I will always miss my first dog. In different ways I loved both of them to bits. I would never have looked for a new dog so early after the passing of my first one. If I hadn’t found him on the street I wouldn’t have taken him in and I would have missed out and so would he.
Taking in an old rescue dog is certainly difficult but, in my view, one of the most beautiful things we can do. We can find solace in the knowledge that we have provided care and love to a being that, without you, would not have received that. It’s what is so admirable in care-givers in hospices, hospitals, old people homes, etc.
If we can see the beauty in providing care and love in the last years of a rescue-pet, whilst we suffer in the knowledge that we will lose them, then maybe that contrast of love and suffering gives us meaning.
It may not be for everyone, it takes courage and fortitude and it could be for you.
Wishing you the best.
